The first week of 2022, spent a lot of time with someone, which excuses why I didn’t have a lot of time to develop on the topics I planned on this week. (completely justified)
- Menopause and women’s health
My mom has been going through menopause recently, and it bothered her. I just paltered with her when she first told me her worries cause I didn’t resonate that much with her. Until I went to a seminar in December last year, I realized how her body changed non-reversibly.
The Chinese culture has severely stigmatized menopause, and it is commonly associated with hysteria and the shame of aging, which explains my mom’s fear of her menopause. She kept telling me: “Once my menstruation stopped, I will age even faster, and I am not a woman anymore.”
According to scientific researches, menopause does have a substantial impact on women’s health conditions. During perimenopause, the estrogen level fluctuates wildly, and once women become menopausal, the hormone stays at a very low level, which brings plenty of health risks.
In addition to the loss of estrogens, other changes in the body will also increase health risks — for example, Osteoporosis, heart disease, and urinary tract infection.
Our society seldom talks about menopause, which only adds to the fear and misunderstanding. My mom thinks only reproduction ability represents her female identity, and menopause is when the whole world tells her: hey, you are not qualified to be a woman anymore, now you are just a creature with no sexual attraction to anyone.
I have no idea how to help her get over the depression, as it’s something human society compelled her to accept. I wish we could have more educational advertisements everywhere to tell women: hey, it’s ok, you are just going through some natural process, you are as charming as you always are.
2. Getting along with DJs!
In the end of 2021, I went to a small village near Dijon, where I met a bunch of DJs. Sometimes I think I’m too much of a goody-goody and I’m definitely not having fun out of it. By random chance, I met this group, and I had a lot of fun with them.
These guys met all the stereotypes (based on my standard) of DJs; they are anarchists, adore hippies, and love living in a community. I had never been to any techno party before, and I never got a chance to know any DJ group, but it was a great & sweet experience to uncover the stereotypes!
We did many fun things together, tripping (my first time with LSD! ), sauna (my first time doing it naked!), cooking (well I cooked a lot) and living a convivial life. I love the fact that living in a community, most of the sentences start with the pronoun “we” and “us” . There was a time someone said:”hey Jacob, come on and clean your pancake pots! “ and Jacob said: “it’s not MY pancake, it was OUR pancake.” I guess that’s what I found charming about living in a group; you share all the happiness also the trouble, you will never fall as there’s always the community supporting you.
Even though we were close, sometimes I still feel the outsider (as I’m the only one who doesn’t play music and completely outside the artist group) and I don’t mind that at all. I could endure the loneliness of not fitting in, and I enjoy the perspective of being an outsider.
Being an outsider means you don’t have to build your value on top of the community value. You can keep your free will, even though sometimes the group won’t accept it. What matters the most for me is staying away from “kitsch” and being critical of everything.